The Sloppy Seconds
Hehe… Ha… HAHA!

A man goes to the Pittsburgh Steelers ticket office and inquires about purchasing play-off tickets. The ticket teller replies that there weren’t any tickets for sale because the Steelers did not make it to the play-offs.

The following day the same man goes to the Pittsburgh Steelers ticket office and inquires about purchasing Steelers play-off tickets. The ticket teller politely replies that there weren’t any tickets for sale because the Steelers did not make it to the play-offs.

This goes on for an entire week. The man goes to the Steelers ticket office inquiring about play-off tickets and the teller says none are for sale because the Steelers did not make it to the play-offs.

Another week of this goes by and the man still is asking the ticket teller about Steelers play-off tickets. Finally the ticket teller in a loud voice says, “I’VE TOLD YOU FOR THE LAST 2 WEEKS THERE WERE NOT ANY TICKETS AVAILABLE BECAUSE THE STEELERS DID NOT MAKE THE PLAY-OFFS!”

“I know,” the man replied, “I drive all the way from Cleveland just to hear you say that! It was worth the gas money.”

Bowser’s Battle Bible

This comic over at 2pstart.com made me literally LOL this morning.

Tip #121 - Bite the Bullet is probably my fav!

"Your boy’s got this condom"

Well, at the request of some, its time for another post!

First off, this has been my first full weekend off since the season started. Usually, I would include bye weekend, but since I was in Chicago and not “relaxing” (aka being lazy), that weekend doesn’t count.

Last night, Jeff, Danny P, and his bro all rolled up to Parma for some board gaming. Specifically, some new board gaming.

After Dan and Bob arrived in “PST” (Petricini Standard Time — usually 45 minutes to an hour later than arranged meeting time), we jumped into a new game by Warhammer called, “Chaos in the Old World”. Basically, each player gets a race/army in which they use to take control of territories. Much like Risk, only not so much. Your army consists of 3 different types of units: a cultist, a middle of the road attacker/defender, and a big beefy guy used to instill fear into your opponents when deployed. The cultist can’t attack, but after each turn is over, allows you to place a “corrupt” token in the territory he is in. If a territory has 12 corruption tokens in it, it is said to be ruined and you can’t gain any benefits of said territory. Every territory is assigned a number and every player is trying to place more members of their army than that number in order to “dominate” the territory. If you dominate the territory at the end of the turn you get victory points. First player to 50 victory points is declared the winner. There is a lot more to the game… you can get upgrades to help your army, play special ability cards from your hand on to territories to give you the upper hand, and there is a “Advance Territory” wheel that allows you special bonuses if you achieve your army’s special ability.

I know that was probably very confusing, but I hope you get a sense of how the game is played. Since it was new and we were all learning the rules, we played twice. I really enjoyed the game, because of all the strategy that needed to be implemented to win. LOVE STRAT!

The second game we played was “Small World”. This game is a little more simple to explain. Basically, the game board is a big continent separated into territories. Every player gets to choose an army and a special ability attached to that army. Depending on what army and special ability you choose, decides the number of units you get each turn to place on territories to take control of them. For example, I had the Ratman army with the special ability “commando”. The ratman allowed me 8 units and commando allowed me 4. At the start of your turn, you simply place your units in different territories and try to take as many over as possible. There is a lot more to this game as well… there are probably over 20 different races and special abilities to choose from, so the game does take a considerable amount of strategy as well. Again, I apologize if none of this makes sense. I’m not the best when describing/teaching people new games…. I guess that’s why Dan has unintentionally been assigned the role of “teacher” when we learn new games.

Both games were very entertaining and I would love to play them again. As usual, we all got pissed at each other while trying to complete our mission in each game. Dan would always claim that Jeff is going to win and that we must attack Jeff, while Bob and I would just egg them both on. Bob’s new saying is, “Your boy’s got this condom”… which in English translates to “I got this covered”. At least 5 times during the evening, Bob would quote this statement in some form and threaten us all because he thought he was going to win. Bob never won. LOL.

My favorite part of the night was that while I was trying to talk Dan out of attacking me and to attack Jeff, Jeff brought up a vendetta he had against me from the last time we played board games about two months ago. Two months ago I backstabbed him in another game, and he’s never let me live it down since! Remember that folks…. people remember that shit! :)

Overall, it was a great way to spend a Saturday evening! I love Dan screaming at Bob every 10 minutes to “take his Christmas Ale” to the face.

Bob: Do you want me to take this to the face!?

Dan: Do it. (hesitation) Just do it Bob!

Bob: Takes a sip.

Rinse. Repeat. That’s how the night went on. I think Bob might have drank a total of 1 Christmas Ale, even though said taking the face was requested over two dozen times. Haha… love it!

If your interested in learning more from the games I tried to explain, visit the links below:

Chaos in the Old World

Small World

Well, I think that’s all for now. Let me note that I’m thoroughly pissed that douche Tony Romo and Dallas won last night. Seeing Jerry Jones happy makes a small part of me wilt away inside. UGH.

As usual… I….

LOVE: Malcolm Gladwell’s “Blink" — Pick it up! It’s a great read!

HATE: Jerry Jones shit eating grin after the end of their game last night. DAMN YOU JJ DAMN YOU!!!!

GOOD NIGHT!

Ocular migraine for the loss… :(

I had to start the day off at work by going through the immense 4 hour HD melt reel that NFL Network sent us and digitize all the good stuff into my Avid for later use. I was starring with a high rate of concentration at the giant 50 inch HD LCD TV I have hanging behind my monitors (taking in all of the greatness which is a 12 camera telecast) and all of the sudden a random blurry spot just popped up in the middle of my vision.

While I thought I might of been crazy, I kept working for roughly five minutes before I realized the spot was getting bigger. I decided to take a break and put my face in my hands, much like you do when you wake up and hate that f’in sun for shining in your windows. As I continued to do that, it kept getting worse and worse, to the degree that I lost all peripheral version and I couldn’t see out of my left eye.

Uh oh.

I immediately ran to the bathroom to see if I burst a blood vessel in my eye, but no damage was visible. While thinking of every possible reason of why I was going blind, I thought maybe it had something to do with me not consuming breakfast in the morning like I usually do. I jetted for the kitchen upstairs, grabbed some cereal and ran back to my desk and scarfed it down. Try fixing a bowl of cereal when you lost your depth perception and can’t see a thing… eating was the same fun!

Although my vision slowly started to come back shortly after inhaling my Cheerios, I noticed that I now had a pounding headache above my right eye. SON OF A BITCH! I tried to sit back down and work, but the pain just intensified and I couldn’t even focus on anything.

I called my eye doctor and his office is closed on Wednesdays… go figure. Tim (friend and co-worker) told me he could drive me to his eye doctor down the street and see if I could get checked up by him. We drive to his eye doctor and the guy is closed too! Somebody please answer this question: Is it in the “Optometrist Code” that all optometrist must take off Wednesdays?! WTF!

Tim whips out his GPS and to my luck, there are no more eye doctors in the vicinity. We then drive down the street to where his doctor is to see if possibly there is an eye doctor in his building. There wasn’t an eye doctor, but there was a “retina specialist”, so I figured, what the hell can’t hurt. By this time, my head is throbbing to the point where it’s making me nauseous and I just want to feel better. We go up to the 5th floor and I talk to the nurse there and she takes all my info down and goes back to talk to the doctor. Five minutes later she says, “He wants you to go to the ER and get yourself check out…. OF COURSE HE DOES.

Tim drives across the street and I go into the ER and check myself in. To make this long story a little shorter, I’ll try to sum the rest up. They take me back to a room, make me put that stupid gown on, and then wait for the doctor. Doctor comes back, I tell her what you just read, and she gets the nurse to put an IV and she schedules for a cat scan. I get some bendryll to make me sleepy so I can nap and then some headache medicine and nausea medicine all pushed through the IV. After a while, I fall asleep and then they come back and take me to get my scan and after the scan is done they return me to my room. Doc comes back and tells me my scan looks extremely clear (thankfully) and that I probably just have what they call an Ocular migraine. Feeling better, she releases me and I go back to work.

What. a. day.

The thing that makes me mad is that the eye doctor at the Retina Specialist could of easily diagnosed that for me and I wouldn’t of had to waste 5 hours of my day. But nooo, he was too busy checking all the old people (who wear those giant black sunglasses that look like they could stop a bullet) for glaucoma or cataracts. I also blame my eye doctor for being closed Wednesday. I can just picture him at home, enjoying his day off, while I think I’m going blind. Also, for all those wondering, he’s basically closed on the weekends too… with the exception of 2 hour window in the morning. I think I got in the wrong profession!

Sorry for the long post. I figured some might get a kick out of these awesome series of events!

Let’s see, today I…

LOVE: Being able to hear everyone’s problems while I lay in the ER for 5 hours. Dizzy pregnant lady to my left, Harmony across the hall fell off the stairs walking out of the airplane and hit her head, and poor Mrs. Thornberry couldn’t pass 9 kidney stones. YES SIR!

HATE: Going the the emergency room. Not because I’m scared, but because it takes sooooo long to get in and out of there. The nurses and the doctor seemed to be very well qualified though!

Christmas came early!

Here’s the pics of my new monitor I promised!

Wide shot!

Close up - 1080p glory!

Xbox shot — plugged in VIA HDMI. Uber pwnage.

The next purchase in the future will be a dual monitor card. Gotta get past Christmas and New Years! Possibly it’ll be a birthday purchase… we’ll see!

Love: Becoming re-organized after spending a week being dis-organized. LOL.

Hate: When people drive with their brights (high beams) on the entire time they are driving at night. Especially when driving on the highway. UGH.

Operation Office Space: Stage 1 Complete

Good evening all. Got a quick update on Operation Office Space. Marin and I finally found a desk we liked and it actually goes with all the black furniture we currently have in the office now.

Here’s a pic of the new setup:

I really like the monitor shelf and the full pull out tray for the keyboard and mouse. It allows us to actually have writing space! Another cool feature of this desk is the USB Hub that is built into the desk! It has four open ports and it connects right to my computer!

We bought the desk at Staples for a quick hundo. It was originally $170, but it was on sale! I really have to commend Staples for their awesome step-by-step assembly directions. They even separated all the screws and cam-locks (another great invention btw!) into different bags based on what step each was needed.

Check this shit out:

If you have to buy any office furniture in the near future, I would suggest that you look at Staples first, solely based on how easy this hoss was to assemble!

I’m also very excited because I ordered a new 1080p, 23 inch ACER LCD monitor on Friday. It is something I wanted for Christmas, so I told everyone in the fam to just throw some money towards it! It was on sale for $170, when it’s usually $230, so needless to say, I’m pretty excited about saving $60 or so. Now, all I have to do is purchase a dual monitor card down the road and I’ll be rolling like a big shot.

When that puppy gets shipped, I’ll take an updated pic and show it off. It has an HDMI port, so I am planning on moving my Xbox in here and gaming on that until Marin gets our TV from work.

Let’s take a look at where Op Office Space stands:

1) Desk
2) Shelving
3) TV mount
4) Floor Rug
5) Reading chairs
6) Two-person table and chair

Since we didn’t spring for an “L” desk and now have a lot of available space, I think I’m going to get a small two-size person table for games (Chess, mostly) and another spot for doing work. The next thing of purchase will probably be shelving though, because we need it!

Well, time for me to go continue my night of relaxation by watching some Dexter: Season 1. I watched the first episode on Thursday and I loved it!

LOVE: Staples: Easy Hardware Pac — GREAT IDEA!

HATE: Being hung over after consuming wayyyy too much Christmas Ale last night. I still have a headache that I can’t get rid of. AHHH!

My main man Dave!

My man Dave is killing it! By the Final Jeopardy question, he had more than double what the second place person had, so he didn’t even have to worry about getting the question wrong!

By the way, I don’t really know Dave. I just happened to catch the first episode that he was on and I was rooting for him before he even won. I always tend to separate one contestant out of the others, like separating the cool kid out of a bunch of douchebags.

Dave really is the man though. He has been pretty much breezed through the competition, with the exception of one night where he had to win on the final question. Did I mention he looks likes Woody Harrelson?!

I would say a young Woody from the likes of “White Men Can’t Jump” or perhaps my all time favorite, “Money Train”. Either way, I’ll be rooting for him tomorrow night!

"IT AIN’T EASY BEING THIS GOOD"

Let’s see what… today I…

LOVE: The week before the playoffs in Fantasy Football. Every game means something to each and every bubble team!

HATE: Not having enough time in the day to do everything you want!

And with the 2nd overall pick, the Ravens select…

With the advent of the new Online League feature in Madden 10 this year, I decided to search around EASport’s forums for a good league to join. After roughly 30 seconds (LOL), I found a league that had a dedicated commish and to my surprise, one open spot left. The only team available was the Detroit Kitty Kats and I certainly didn’t really want them. The commish said he would give me his team, which happened to Ravens, so I gladly accepted.

The league is called “Hardcore Madden” and we just finished the first season. I’m not the greatest Madden player and my first season record definitely showed: 3-13. Ouch. I did make a great trade early in the season for Adrian Peterson (arguably the best player in the game), but Flacco blew and I really didn’t have any great receivers who could catch his deep balls. Needless to say, I’m very excited for our first draft of the league, which takes place tomorrow!

I’m in desperate need of a QB, WR, and ROLB. Part of the Peterson deal included Tyrell Suggs, so I’m weak on that LB side. I would also like to get Peterson some studs up front to open up even bigger holes then what were opened in Season 1. Since I did so incredibly awful in my first season, I get the 2nd overall pick. There are a few great QBs I could choose from, but I haven’t quite made my decision yet. On a side note, the best QB that can be drafted has the name of Tim Twebow. Gee, I wonder who that could be EA?!

Our league is actually pretty well run and we even have our own website. The commish has been doing a great job running a full 32 person league without many problems. After the first week, I volunteered my services and he appointed me the “Graphic’s Guy”. Providing cool graphics (website header, scorebar, avatars, etc) has been really fun, considering I’m not actually that good at Madden.

Here is the latest banner I created for Season One’s Super Bowl Champ:

Every week, we selected an offense and defense “Player of the Week”. Here is an example of the banner I would update every week:

For those who have Madden 10, but were skeptical in joining/creating an online league, I suggest you do so. It’s really the most fun I’ve had since the Super Tecmo Bowl league I ran back in the Green Monster days. If anyone is interested (and plays on the Xbox) please let me know. We have spots open up every couple weeks because people drop out for various reasons.

Once the draft is over, I’ll be sure to post on how I did!

Love/Hate of the Day:

Love: My fantasy hockey team scoring 100 points in one night. SID THE KID!!!!

Hate: People that are capable of doing their jobs, but choose to either do them poorly or not do them at all.

Deskography

Well, I think my decision has been made. Instead of keeping the 4-1 multi-purpose “fun house” room, we’ve decided to turn our spare room into the office/video game room for maximum usage. The poker table will eventually find its way down to the basement, where a poker room will hopefully develop in the future.

To continue this quest, I have explored a number of creative and useful websites to help me design the room. Below, I will showcase some examples of how I think I want to setup the room.

This desk setup is what I think I’m going to try to go for:

I like the “L” shape for maximum desk space. Granted, I’m not going to have 5 monitors like this guy, but you get the point.

This is what I would like the “entertainment” side to look like:

I like the way the TV is mounted to the wall and then surrounded by shelves. It is a very good use of space, especially since our office will probably be kind of small.

The only thing I’m not thrilled about is I’m not sure where I’m going to put Butch’s massive furniture. It is pretty big and blocky and it takes up a lot of space. Now that we know we are turning it into an office, I’ve made a list of items we need to purchase in order to make this happen.

(Items are ordered in terms of importance)

1) Desk - Can’t really have an office without a desk
2) Shelving (like pictured above)
3) TV mount (already got a TV coming)
4) Floor Rug — Hard wood floors get cold. Damn cold. Need to warm up the place.
5) Reading chairs (if Butch’s don’t work)

I might also get real crafty and paint too. Maybe a light gray or something. That will definitely be TBD before we purchase furniture.

If you’ve always wanted to have your own office or want to get inspired to redo your current office, here are a couple of links that I’ve used for inspiration:

Deskography - People display their work-spaces. There are some pretty awesome setups here.

Lifehacker: Doors for Desks - Lifehacker is awesome. It is soo much more than desks. If you’re a dork like me, or just like to be crafty, they have tonsssss of things to keep you busy.

Instructables: Desks & Bookshelves - Some really creative stuff here. People love making things out of junk and garbage.

Penny-Arcade Forums: Show us your workstation thread - Dorks like me showcasing their “setups”… some pretty sweet stuff here.

That’s about it for now for Operation: Office Space. I’ll update everyone once we get passed the holidays and I can start saving money for all the shit we need to buy!

As I said in my earlier post, I would like to end each post with something I love and hate, so here goes:

LOVE: Semtex grenades in the new Call of Duty 4. They are grenades that stick to anything it touches. Bombing them across the map and sticking them on an unexpected prone sniper is probably the best thing ever. Or maybe on a guy dumb enough to be running around with a riot shield. Hehe.

HATE: Driving on Bagley Rd. in Berea/Strongsville/Parma. Anytime. I hate it. Bleh.

GOOD NIGHT!

A witch won Jeopardy tonight.

I’m not making this up. If you watched Jeopardy tonight, you know what I’m talking about. The woman who won tonight dressed and acted like a witch. The only thing she needed to top off the act was a pointy hat and perhaps a black cat sitting on the podium. It was also very strange that she was the only one who knew the last question and the other two contestants just put random books that were important to history. Not only that, she wagered EVERY PENNY. Who does that?! Everyone knows your supposed to wager all but one dollar just in case. The only reason I’m not going off into a super rant is because I love when people go “balls to the wall” and come from behind in win. I might just have to watch The Wicked Witch of Jeopardy to see what kind of hocus pocus she uses to win tomorrow. GOOO WITCHES!

In other news, I’m having a bit of a dilemma. As some of you know, Marin and I moved our bedroom upstairs and moved the office/library/video game emporium/casino into our old room downstairs. The particular dilemma I am having is whether or not to make this new room just an office/video game room or if I should try and keep it as a card room too. Marin and I want to purchase a new desk, mainly because our current one is about 8 years old and is being held together with 50% of the screws that originally came with it.

At first, I wanted to get a small desk and keep the available leftover space (once we moved some chairs out and such) for my poker table, so that in the event that I do have a poker game, we have a dedicated space for it. However, to date, I have only had about 5 or 6 poker games total in our house and I feel like I am wasting the allotted space.

So entails my dilemma and question of the night: Do we purchase a smaller desk and keep the space available for poker nights or do we purchase a large desk and turn it into an official office?

Keep in mind, that we are still going to be obtaining/purchasing a TV to put in here in order to take my Xbox out of the living room. Thus, the “video game room” entitlement.

Here is what the room currently looks like:

Chairs

These chairs are from the Butch Davis Collection - Circa 2004. My mom said she would make black slip covers for these to match the current furniture color in the room.

Poker table

Poker table and small coffee table. (Currently, located directly across from the chairs)

Computer

There’s my computer set up, along with a small bookcase.

If anyone has any suggestions or ideas, please let me know!

Right now, I’m currently leaning towards putting the poker table in the basement and making this a big office/video game room. If I went with this option, I would eventually like to make some part of the basement a poker room. Perhaps, I could call it “Teddy KGB’s Place” like the good ol’ days.

Well, I think that’s it for tonight. For all those who didn’t know, I’m testing out a new blogging site called tumblr. I’m not sure if I really like it, but I’m giving it a test run.

From now on, at the end of every post, I’m going to try to post one thing that I love and one thing that I hate. Should be interesting, so here it goes:

LOVE: Frozen Food (expecially pizza)

HATE: When someone calls you to talk to someone that is with you, when they could of just called that person in the first place!

Good night!